Random Thoughts

So really I blog because my brain is always thinking and if i post every thought on FB; people would think like I really have diarrhea of the mouth.  Porque ju know my brain be sometimes like on wild ADHD mode.

So like back in the days, I was like wild odee shy.  Like ask my family! LML  I would never talk and just sit in the corner and do me.  Like you had to pull teeth to get something out of me. (Moma Doris  knows).  Now am like the only Social Butterfly and very expressive.  I think I was a turtle trapped in it's shell that has been let out.  Sometimes I think that I be wild bugging with the shit that comes out my mouth.  I am like the happiest hyperlest kid right now. Yea Am Still a KID AT HEART!!  But I ain't gonna front; I still have my shy moments but that is only when I meet someone for the first time.  Although I don't find that when I go into the field.  I think it's because it's my gift.

Ok! so now, let me tell you what's on mind.  So everybody knows I am a CPS and very proud.  Although sometimes I bitch and moan about shit.  I love my job! Why?! Because it's me, it's what I always wanted to do.  Pero ya van cuatro ano's que yo estoy en la misma baina.   Like I am so good at what I do! And as the the days go by; I find myself getting better and better.  Back in 2008, I was a little lost but after going under many of my people's wings; I have developed a lot of skills and grown in the field to the point that work doesn't stress me anymore.  I have learned how to pace myself and maintain myself.  Pero avece la baina que la jente hacen does sometimes get to me; but I be learning to put my feelings aside and do what I gotta do.  I have learned to keep my focus on.   OMG! I am like so proud of myself right now cause I have matured so much since I have entered the agency.  And I must say although I worked over the summer, I maintained a low case load which was something I had difficulties doing when I first started.  But that was because I had no real training and learned everything on my own.   FYI My training supervisor sucked and I am not afraid to say it to her face; therefore I am not afraid to express it here.  (My bill of rights says that I am entitled to FREEDOM OF SPEECH).  And FYI I am not slandering that person because I didn't say her name but I am entitled to express my feelings.  Perate pero I sound like wild guilty right now; oh whatever meng it's truth anyways!

So I enjoyed my summer with my low caseload and ready to tackle the school year.  The reason I say it this way is because it's really during the school year when we get the most cases.  Summer is pretty slow and quiet.

OH! SO! I really feel that I am ready for my own Unit.  In other words, I am ready to be a Supervisor and been ready cause I got mad skills.  Like I really know all the hoopla and what not.  So I be having like the only balls.  So I go to my DD and ask her when can I have my own unit.  She says when I go back to school.  Like I got a Bachelor's in Forensic Psychology and 4 years CPS experience.  What more do they want?! Oh wait she told me.  They want me to have 30 credits towards my Master's in SW; pero y que es esa baina que it gotta be disque in SW.  Like what if I want to study something else?! Oh and on top of that disque que I gotta be a Supervisor Level I before I be promoted to a Supervisor Level II.  Y la baina es que they not even hiring Supervisor Level I's .  You rarely see people getting promoted or hired to SUP I because disque we (The Agency) don't have the money to hire people for Sup I's pero we got people in our own oficina with Master's and what not que are still CPS.

Pero; I don't know.  I don't know if they even tried applying for the position o es que they stuck where they at and what not because sometimes la gencia be with their baina and shit.  Sometimes their hoopla be making me wonder.  Pero yo me quedo con lo mio.  Because at the end of the day I appreciate my job and I love what I do.  But I am definitely going to get my 30 credits and work towards getting my Unit until I become the next Commissioner of NYCCS.   Cause you know that's still my goal.

Oh yea So, back when I first started I was like lost and had no one to assist me and guide me being that my supervisor sucked; so I was forced to learn on my own.  So like 3 years ago I met a trainee and taught her some of the ropes and what not.  Once in a while I check in on her, when of course I am not very busy.  And she seems to be surviving cause she still here.  Anyways that's when it dawned on me that my agency should have like a mentoring program with us who been there long enough can mentor new workers and guide them and show them the ropes.

But a lot of them (other Cps) don't agree.  They feel like it's not our job and we don't get paid for that.  But as far as I can remember no one gets paid to be a mentor that's some volunteer shit.  Diablo pero avese I cuss too much...yo tengo que trabajar en eso.  Anyways so I am going to take initiative to start a mentoring program for new trainees...well more like I already did cause I have two mentees.  It makes me happy that I can help people out; especially out of my own free will and that they appreciate it.  I don't want no one to ever have to feel the way I felt when I first started.

There are some people that might feel some type of way about this blog as they feel some type of way because I hang with my Deputies (cause there are 3 that I roll with) and CPM's and I give my personal cell out to them because we not only colleagues but we're also semi friends! I just want to tell them IDGAF how you feel about how I feel cause this me and this is who I am always gonna be! And to those (colleagues=business) who always telling me that they disque don't mix business with pleasure. Then why yah on my facebook =(pleasure) and shit and why yah be texting=(pleasure)  me on my personal cell?! #JUST SAYING!

Anyways migente....hasta la proxima!  Thanks for reading!